Before opening up, J and I didn’t get out much. Like ever, really. We don’t drink, so we never tried the bar scene, or even the club scene. Weekdays were school, work, schoolwork, Seinfeld, popcorn, dog walks, and sleep. Weekends were sleep, eat, sleep, Seinfeld, gym, study, sleep.
Now….
I am tired! I have never juggled so much social activity with everything else. Skype date. Dinner with new couple. Strip club with new couple. Sex club. Five emails to draft, edit, send. Skype date. Travel and meet new friends. Texts from sexy friends. Emails. Dinner date… and school still? And work? And studying? Haha, the juggling is definitely worth it, but I can’t really remember how quiet and boring our weekends used to be! And yet… I find myself a little tired from all of the social activity. Not tired in the sense that I want it to stop, but tired in the sense that I am mentally and emotionally a little tired. I just need a little quiet time, a little me time; just some time to be unsocial.
It has been so interesting to see both myself and J in these new social situations. For the 4 1/2 years that we were exclusive, J and I saw each other mostly in one-on-one contexts, or during times with our families. Now, in group situations, I see more of J’s exuberant and outgoing personality, and how other people respond to his intelligence and smile. I have also felt myself learning, and loving, being so open with other people and figuring out how to communicate with other people after working on communication for so long with J. It has been so energizing for me overall to engage in social settings, especially in those involving our sexy and open friends! I feel so grateful to have the ability to go out and be sexy with sexy friends, and to live in a time and place where fulfilling our sexuality can be done safely, leisurely, and in balance with our other commitments.