Category Archives: Group Sex

Yummy dreams

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I’ve dreamed about you since I last saw you. I used to stare at you, for four years, I stared at you. We never talked- maybe once or twice. I’m not sure what exactly about you I lusted after. But I dream about you still. Always delicious dreams. You tease me in my dreams, like you did unknowingly when we were 16. Sometimes my dreams became raunchy group sex scenes with you and all of your friends from high school, but you and I still do not interact.

Last night, though, this time, when I saw you, I grabbed your hand and ran with you into an empty room. We kissed, you grabbed my body, feeling it for the first time. I jumped up, you held me, my legs wrapped around your back. I felt ecstatic. The charge was electric. I was so turned on and wanted you so badly.

J was in another place, another room. Knew what I was doing, and was excited to hear about it later. Two close friends appeared, laughing at my ecstasy.

We stopped kissing, your eyes told me that it couldn’t go any further because you have a girlfriend. “Dream me” cared, but didn’t want to. Wanted to disregard the ethics of the situation. But you were resolute and that was okay. I was still riding the joy from taking charge, grabbing you, having you follow, kissing you.

I have been noticing new energy in my life the past few days. I feel “on”- turned on, integrated, joyful even when I’m feeling sad. Our two sexy friends came over last night to celebrate a birthday, and it was magnificently delicious. I’m crushing hard on another beautiful friend, and I love that feeling. And then these dreams I have- it’s like I get to continue to feel that charge through my sleep. I love it.

Sensual Dreams

happy birthday

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Today is my birthday!! 26 years young/old, beautiful, brave, and strong.

Last night I celebrated with a 2 1/2 hour long massage and a super hot threesome. What better way?? For reals- it was truly the best.

It’s a low key birthday this year, and that is just fine with me. It reflects how I’ve been feeling- a little more introverted and quiet. I’m resting. Things are changing at deep levels, and it’s a slow and sometimes painful process. I’ve set an intention for my year: that my internal emotional world is changing for the better. That I will start to feel, think, and act more loving toward myself and those around me. That the value of universal love will consume my being and my relationships with others. That fear and competitiveness and anger will fall to the sidelines of my experience. I feel confident and hopeful that the steps I’ve begun to take have already begun to take me to where I want to go.

Hopefully tonight J and I will watch the newest episode of Game of Thrones, and then we’re seeing some best friends tomorrow for dinner. We’re painting on Saturday and then having a formal birthday dinner together. It all sounds lovely and peaceful. I’m so grateful to be where I am and to have all of the support around me that I do, and a place to call home and a partner that I love and loves me too.

Sexy Storytelling

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I had a Skype meeting last night with one of the producers of our local Mystery Box storytelling shows, and I am excited to work on two stories for them!

I told a narrative of my experience with school and stripping, but I also really want to work on one about the birthday gift that I did for J a couple years ago (the gangbang film).

Eric gave me some good feedback about how to structure the story.

Start with a beginning scene, add some narrative, describe another scene, add some narrative, describe another scene, etc.

Describing the moments that were particularly emotional and difficult to explain why for me this situation was so challenging.

Give the audience a flavor of who I am as a whole person before saying I’m a stripper.

This story is emotional for me and brings up a lot of vulnerability, and while this will draw an audience in, it also teeters on making me want to stand on my soapbox about sex worker rights which could alienate audience members.

The gangbang story is lighthearted and fun- a much different tone and intention.

In any case, I am excited about working on these and hopefully telling one or both sometime in the future!

Do you have any sexy stories you would ever share publicly like this? Maybe you should get in touch with Eric & Reba yourself! Or share here anonymously if the whole “standing in front of a bunch of strangers and talking about it” sounds a little intimidating (it does to me, too) :)

storytelling

An Insider’s Guide to Hotwifing and Cuckolding

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I wrote a post for DatingAdvice on hotwifing and cuckolding :)

Check it out!

An Insider’s Guide to Hotwifing and Cuckolding

My conclusion:

“Consider this:

Most of the new readers to my blog have arrived there because they were searching for things like “hotwifing,” “hotwife lifestyle” and “hotwife,” and my most popular posts are those on the subject.

Subreddits formed around the topic are flooded with conversation. Fetlife groups catered to the community are huge.

Search the M4MW on the casual encounters section of Craigslist and you’ll likely see a sizable group of people looking for encounters. Hotwife and cuckold porn are also common.

I think it’s taboo for men to admit they are turned on thinking about their girlfriends or wives having sex with someone else. Common worries, fears and questions I have heard include, “Does it mean they are less of a man? Or they have penis envy? Or they are gay?”

Breaking down those fears means breaking down cultural messages and assumptions related to gender identity, sexual orientation and patriarchy.

Similarly, it may be difficult for women to understand a male partner’s fascination with hotwifing or cuckolding, especially if she adheres to messages related to monogamy.

In any case, if you are turned on thinking about a partner of yours getting it on with another guy, please know you are not alone!

I think this fantasy and turn-on is probably one of the most common out there, and it is possible to explore it safely (emotionally, physically, sexually) both in your imagination and with a willing partner.”

My Favorite Threesome Positions

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My latest DatingAdvice post is now live: My Favorite Threesome Positions

Read on for my intro, and please go read the rest if you are so inclined :)

“How do you actually have a threesome? I mean, I get you put three fun and sexually adventurous people together, but what are the mechanics of it? How do you fit three people together?

We don’t see threesomes in mainstream media, so unless you watch porn, you may feel a little stumped or even duped (Do people actually do that? Does it really feel good?)

I’m here to help.”

What are your favorite positions? Any majorly hot ones I missed?

Picking Your Third

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My latest DA post is live: “How to Pick Your Third for a Threesome“

Read on for my intro:

“You and your partner are ready to dive into some sexual explorations and want to invite another person into your bedroom. Who should you pick?

When J and I invite people into our bedroom, we do so based off some broad principles (which we have talked about before inviting others into our bedroom, and in some cases, figured out together after a disappointing experience).

1. Are we both attracted to the person?

Even if we are going to have an MFM in which J and the other man are not sexually into one another, it’s still important that J be intellectually and mentally connected to the other man.

Determining if we both dig someone else’s vibe, physically and energetically, is an important first step.”

Do you have certain criteria for inviting someone into your bedroom for a threesome?

Double Vaginal Penetration

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Occasionally I like to write posts based on search terms that have directed readers to my site. This and the next post are based on said search terms.

Double Vaginal Penetration (aka DVP)

It sounds like a move-made-for-porn (and who knows, maybe it was). Who would want that? Why? How do you even do that?

As someone who has engaged in DVP a few times, I have some advice and insight to offer, although my perspective is limited.

1. Double penetration does not necessarily equal double cocks. J and I first started flirting with this idea by using both his cock and another dildo inside of me. It is tricky to maneuver (and not the same as having two live cocks), but you can experience a similar amount of fullness, stretching, and pleasure from it. I’ve found this to feel best with J on top of me and then sliding a dildo inside underneath his cock.

2. The vagina can stretch remarkably large- hello! Babies get birthed out of that thing. Of course your vagina can stretch large enough to accommodate more than one cock at a time. But…

3. Like preparing for fisting or inserting any large object, it’s important to warm up slowly and well. Make sure to use plenty of lube, and that you are doing what you usually do to be turned on optimally (dirty talk, oral sex, fingering, porn, etc.). If something doesn’t feel right, stop. If something hurts, stop. Know your own anatomy and pay attention to the signals you receive from your body. I know that for me, I have a number of smaller folds of skin that can get irritated quickly by too much friction of too much of something inside of me- it’s important to slow down, add more lube, and communicate.

4. Feel comfortable with your partner(s). Not just for safer sex purposed, but for ensuring your ability to stop the activity if it starts to feel uncomfortable in any way. Especially with safer sex considerations, it’s important that everyone feels comfortable being so close all at once.

5. It’s hot. If you already know you enjoy MFM group sex, then this is a really amazing position addition. My go-to positioning is to ride one person and have the other enter from behind like in doggy style. I generally slide onto the one cock, and let the person behind enter. From there, it just takes some experimentation with coordinating movements. I’ve found that everyone has a pleasurable time of it.

Have you ever done DVP? Do you have any other suggestions for how to have DVP happily, safely, and pleasurably?

Cuckolding/Hotwifing Post

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For those of you interested in cuckolding, hotwifing, and other similar fantasies, this is an excellent post on the subject. The author also writes  a pretty fantastic blog called The Psychology of Human Sexuality; I recommend you check it out!

His post gives nice space to discussing sperm competition theory, which I love:

“Increasingly, scientists favor a biological explanation based on a growing body of work on sperm competition. Research shows that when one woman mates with several men, those men can display behavioral and biological changes intended to increase their likelihood of fertilizing her egg—without even realizing it. For example, when men masturbate to porn featuring multiple men having sex with the same woman, their ejaculate contains more active sperm than it does when they beat off to an all-female threesome, according to a 2005 study of 52 men. Other research has found that men report thrusting faster and deeper during sex when they suspect their female partner has cheated, presumably as a way of displacing rival sperm. These findings suggest the provocative possibility that men are “wired” to find cuckold scenarios arousing because they promote behaviors that help their own sperm win a raging intra-vaginal sperm war.”

Performance Anxiety During Group Sex

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My next DatingAdvice post is live today: What If You Can’t Perform During Group Sex?

I think this is a common thing for people (not just men) to be concerned about. Female bodies just have the luxury of hiding their physical arousal or non-arousal more easily.

What have you done during a group sex encounter when you experienced performance anxiety? What helped you?

Here’s the conclusion of the article; go read the rest if you’re so inclined! :)

“If your cock isn’t hard, there could be a number of reasons.

In a group sex situation, often a non-erect cock has more to do with self-pressure to perform, nervousness or unfamiliarity with the situation or partner(s) than it does with attraction or interest in the situation or people involved.

Simply talking about it with your partners can help redirect your attention and energy away from one of your body parts to engaging with the people in the room. Offer to go down on someone or make out with someone.

Do your best to be present and if you become physically aroused, awesome. If you don’t, awesome.

If you are in the presence of other sexually intelligent people, then they will respect your body and communication and go with the flow, too.

Just have fun, relax and enjoy yourself. How many people get to experience group sex, anyway?”

What Does Non-Traditional Relationship Utopia Look Like?

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I am so excited to announce that I have made another amazing connection- with Louisa Leontiades, of The Husband Swap. (See my post about her book here.) She also hosts several amazing websites: MultipleMatch, The Vagina Times, Postmodern Women, among others. She also writes a blog for the Huffington Post.

I recently co-authored an article with her about Portland as a poly-mecca, which is now live on MultipleMatch and will be published soon on HuffPo (I’ll be announcing that when it happens- I am so excited!)

Definitely go check her stuff out; I am thrilled to be in connection with her!

Here is the beginning of the article about Portland; please go read the rest!

“What if you could be openly welcomed with both your lovers at the local chemist… what if coming out as trans, queer or poly was simply one of many choices during adolescence… what if going to a dungeon to play kinky games on a Saturday night was as accepted as going out for a curry… What would the world look like?

Welcome to Poly-Mecca, Portland OregonPowell’s is Portland’s claim to bookstore fame. And it was there that I bought the book which was to change my life. It was – predictably – Sex at Dawn. Because although my partner and I met in Berkeley, California which seems to outsiders to be a liberal, bohemian heaven, we didn’t open our relationship until we had moved to Portland for graduate school. Portland is my idea of Poly-Mecca. A city with the social capital to support my wildest explorations and adventures.

Oregon boasts laws that protect some sexual expression as freedom of speech; thus, walking around naked is legal. Even if most don’t… most of the time ;-)

This also allows for an amazing number of strip clubs to exist. In fact Portland stands as the city with the highest number of strip clubs per capita in the country – most of which are fully nude clubs. Establishments are allowed to have both nudity and alcohol which attracts visitors from neighboring states to enjoy both booze and bums. This also means that Portland has the legal and social infrastructure to support two swingers’ clubs, both of which offer the ability to imbibe and have sex onsite.”